Time for bunting (the decorative kind)
Opening Day is tomorrow. Our gaze is, understandably, cast towards the future. But the day before Opening Day is a good time to look back, to take stock. To recall Opening Days past, whether they foretold seasons good, bad, or just plain ridiculous. Like a good appetizer, it’ll whet your hardball appetite for the days to come.
“Big League Battlers Renew The Fight After Glorious Opening Day”- 1921
The Philadelphia Inquirer was overjoyed at the return of baseball to the city’s daily routine. If the exuberant headline wasn’t enough to get the point home, the accompanying cartoon, featuring a besotted man labeled “Sporting World” getting down on his knees to proclaim his love to a demure baseball-headed dame, certainly did. And how were the Phillies faring as baseball made its magnificent comeback? Well, that brings us to the subheader: “Phillies Buried Under Landslide”.
That landslide came in the form of the New York Giants, who pummeled the hapless Phils by a score of 10 to 2. “Eight thousand paying pilgrims journeyed to the orchard to eye the massacre, not to mention John A. Heydler, president of the National League”, reported scribe Gordon Mackay. But if Mackay couldn’t write about a Phillies victory, he could at least describe their pain in marvelously over-the-top fashion. The game was “an afternoon devoted to the science of slugology”, with the Giants’ runs “hefty and untainted and earned… counted through a remarkable blend of passes and humps and thumps and passes”.
At any rate, the Athletics won, so there was something for Philadelphians to cheer about anyway. Benefits of a two-team town.
“Jimmy Ring Has Now Won One More Game Than He Did in 1927”-1928
If this headline had been published after the campaign was well underway, it would’ve been a rousing celebration of a veteran pitcher’s success. But it was published immediately after Opening Day. You can do the math.
Why was a 0-game winner picked to start on Opening Day, anyway? Well, the Phillies were to open on a cold day in Brooklyn, and Ring, an aging hurler with “little hair on top and not much more on the sides”, had some experience with cold weather pitching. You see, when he was still working his way up from the minors he played for a club which called a stadium named Arctic Park home. Or maybe the explanation behind his start was something else; the author of the article freely admitted his narrative—in which manager Burt Shotton plucks a reluctant Ring from a crowd of Phillies “huddle[d] apprehensively around a small electric heater, wishing to a man they were reading books in some warm apartment”— was invented. But the facts are these: Ring pitched all 9 innings against the Dodgers and delivered a 4-3 Opening Day victory for the Phillies. He would add 3 more wins over the course of the 1928 season, then call it a career.
“They’re Still the Phillies Even in Season’s Opener”-1946
The sun was shining bright on April 17, 1946, as the Phillies prepared to open their season against the Giants in New York. Second-year manager Ben Chapman had spent the offseason attempting to conquer the team’s “defeatism complex”, replacing most of the starting lineup and encouraging the players to have “hustle and chatter”. And it seemed to have worked: outfielder Ron Northey predicted the Phillies would finish in the top half of the National League. His teammate Jimmy Wasdell went much further, not only calling for the Phils to win the pennant, but predicting the exact date (September 18th) they’d clinch it. “These are the new Phillies and we’re going to be tough to beat this year”, said Chapman.
The Phillies proceeded to fall behind in the 1st inning of the opener, and could not recover, losing 8 to 4. The United Press writer covering the game admitted that judging the team by a single game “might not be strictly kosher”, but couldn’t help relaying a zinger overheard in the press box: “Well, they’re still the Phillies!”
“Phillies’ Opening Day Lineup Includes Only One ‘59 Regular”- 1960
The 1959 Phillies finished dead last in the National League, so you couldn’t blame manager Eddie Sawyer for making big changes. Only the team’s leading batter in 1959, first baseman Ed Bouchee, was permitted to hold onto his spot. Per the article, Sawyer was “pinning his hopes and probably risking his job on young players”.
Sawyer presided over a 9-4 Opening Day loss to Cincinnati, then immediately resigned.
“For Openers, Phils have Paul Revere and Rocket Man”-1976
How best to celebrate Opening Day for America’s pastime in America’s bicentennial year? Simple: hire a guy to dress up as Paul Revere, with instructions to ride down from Boston on horseback with baseball in hand (make sure to tell him to leave 2 weeks before game day, so he’ll have enough time). Once he’s there, have him hand the ball to a guy in the bullpen. Not a pitcher, though: a guy with a jetpack. Then have the jetpack guy launch himself into the air and do a circuit of the stadium. Then once he lands, have him give the ball to Robin Roberts, who’ll throw the first pitch.
Well, it was more interesting than red, white, and blue bunting.
Mackay, Gordon. “Big League Battlers Renew The Fight After Glorious Opening Day”. Philadelphia Inquirer, April 15, 1951. Pg 18
Holmes, Thomas. “Jimmy Ring Has Now Won One More Game Than He Did in 1927: Maybe Early Training at Arctic Park Helped the Marquis of Maspeth”. Brooklyn Daily Eagle, April 12, 1928, Pg. 28
United Press. “They’re Still the Phillies Even in Season’s Opener”. Wewoka Times-Democrat. April 17, 1946. Pg. 6
Associated Press. “Phillies’ Opening Day Lineup Includes Only One ‘59 Regular”. The Salem News. April 6, 1960. Pg 10
Associated Press. “For Openers, Phils have Paul Revere and Rocket Man”. The Mercury, February 17, 1976. Pg 18